I wrote this in 2020 – 21 while going through a difficult time

everyone around you is making plans
all you want
is to get away
run away from it all

because being around people
makes you feel
like you’re under a perilous scan

you apologize, to escape from the plan
because they just wouldn’t understand
what it feels like inside your head
like misery galore, I think

you give these excuses so lame
that they got no option, but to look at you with pity and shame

you know that everyone wants what’s best for you
but no one sees, how it really feels
to be thrown everyday into the unknown
and how it just never heals

you don’t want to trouble anyone
by explaining, what you are having to endure
because each has their own struggles
on such a spree, that makes them unsure

© Lishaka Gulati

how is it?

how is it

that the person who gives you the most, takes away even more, unknowingly, unflinchingly

how is it

that in the starting few months of your love story, you love ever so deeply but still stay insecure and fragile

how is it

that your most alone moments after a fight or an argument are spent in isolation but still surrounded by the glimpses of the ‘other’

how is it

that sometimes we want to stop fighting but our body physically makes it impossible for us to do so

how is it

that we feel so much for our relationships and our familial issues and yet don’t care enough for all the wrongdoings going on in our country

how is it

that we are built this way? to care so much and yet not at all

and why is it

that to awaken our sense of nationalism, I am writing a poem that begins with love and relationships merely to get everyone’s attention

Trespassing in Paradise

quietly, stealthily
I walk

trying to not be noticed
by the owners of this property

I don’t know
how I came to enter this place
but now that I’m here
I never want to leave this space

it’s so beautiful
white like the cocaine
as far as the eyes can see

I’m so glad, that the gates were opened, to this monumental grace
while I stood in my waiting line
waiting to be entered, into my hellish state

I should forget about that, now
that’s past me

I’ve to just try
at my own steady pace
to move around this serene solace
that the guards fondly called paradise

quietly, stealthily
I walk

trying to not be noticed
by the owners of this property

I don’t know
how I came to enter this place
but now that I’m here
I never want to leave this space

© Lishaka Gulati

It’s just that

its just that
isn’t the same as living

and saying thank you
isn’t the same as having gratitude

its just that
loving someone
doesn’t necessarily mean you’re in love

and at times
changing the world
doesn’t necessarily mean you’re saving the world

it’s just that
not knowing, what’s happening around you
doesn’t necessarily mean
you’re living under a rock

and being married
doesn’t necessarily mean
that you’re settled

its just that
we got to try
to not be disillusioned
by these so called
‘grown-up’ perspectives

its just that
we got to try
to not let faith
be based
solely on comfort
and excuses

it’s just that
we got to try
to not let that magic
within us

its just that
we got to try
to live our life
and not just

© Lishaka Gulati

they come and they go, they do as they please

words come to you
but then, they drift off
before you could even make sense of them
or write them down

they leave you wondering
that you aren’t good enough
for them to stay
that how even the devil won’t take you
because the devil, too, has standards some

oh, the negativity
takes a toll on you
one fell swoop
and you begin the process, of undervaluing yourself

such solitary life
that even words don’t stick around
is this what people call misery?
it surely must be

the words are starting to come back to you, again
you must concentrate
before they get away
so, you submit, like christ on the cross

but then, they again drift off
before you could even make sense of them
or write them down

© Lishaka Gulati

Notes of Hope – of Questioning Behaviour

you strive and for what
what’s the point
you tire yourself and for what
what’s the point
doesn’t make sense
all this pretense
you work for someone else
what’s the point
they tell you what to do
and you do it
they tell you, how to do it
and you do it
really, what’s the point
maybe you’ll quit your job today
yes, you should do it
now you work for yourself
you are free
you’re also fearful
so, what’s the point

the point is, that today
we’ll help you
alter your approach
that’s the point
the point is, that today
we’ll help you
instill an impression
of copiousness
in yourself
that’s the point
because there are things, many
in this universe, unbridled
all ready for you
so don’t just survive
live and live free
that’s the point

© Lishaka Gulati

Wooden Bedside Table – of Superstitious Behaviour

someone comes up to me
and says something nice
all I can think about, is wanting to flee
for how could someone say such vice

my body reflexes on the compliment and immediately reacts with “what the hell man, now why did you say that for?”
my hand, meanwhile, reaches for my wooden bedside table and I mutter the words “touch – wood” and at the same time, stare at the person in disbelief, with a glare

now what does that term even mean
it’s a rhetorical question, so leave it clean
I don’t know how I even started using that term
maybe I picked it off from my mother
who ardently believes that this would ward off evil intentions that people sometimes tend to cover

I use this term a lot
and whenever I do so, I tend to always get caught
whenever a compliment comes my way
I tend to make a face and try to get away, to my wooden bedside table to say those golden words and save my day

why did I only mention, my wooden bedside table
well, I’m always in bed, that’s why I said
so you don’t end up feeling, like you’ve been misled

© Lishaka Gulati

It’s Friday

it’s windy, and also a little chilly
but I don’t know if it’ll rain or not, really

it’s thundering now
but I still don’t see any raindrop on the ground

so, basically, what I’m trying to say
is that what has to happen, will happen
in its intended way

then why can’t I just enjoy the weather
for the way the wind feels and the sweet smell that it brings
without anxiously waiting for the end – result or the rain to begin

it’s Friday, I’m sitting near my half – opened windows
looking at the way the plants sway in their pots
and suddenly, I see the raindrop

the faint drops falling on the ground
and look how the Earth’s surface gets wet
the wind and the smell is now upset
because the rain has made people to forget

the weather is still windy
there is lightning now and thunder in the clouds
and I wait for the heavy rain to occur
because that’s the result of this weather, don’t you concur

there is no appreciation of the wind
or how dark it becomes on a Friday afternoon
just the pining need for the end – result, to happen soon

constantly thinking about, will it happen and, how will it happen
why can’t I just be in the now? instead of continuously waiting for the baton

it’s Friday today and this is how I describe my feelings, this day
we’ll see the way, of how tomorrow conveys

© Lishaka Gulati


there are these boundaries that I see and they somehow seem to constrict me
I don’t remember creating them, but they now, somehow, engulf me

there are these boundaries that I feel
that seem to have a strange power over me
they tell me, what is right and what is wrong, and that if I do something beyond
I will risk experiencing failure and my self-esteem will falter even greater

there are these boundaries that I see and they seem to have an unusual control over me
it is so hard for me, to even breathe, when these boundaries keep on smothering me

there are these boundaries, that I want to break, but I am so scared, as now they have placed these tiny pieces of glass on the boundary wall
as a means, to try to keep me enclosed, within the designated space

there are these boundaries, that seem to keep me, so walled off and so closed off
they have now become so rigid, so restrictive, thus making it so difficult for me, to escape them or get rid of

© Lishaka Gulati

P.S. this piece was written a few months back

Melancholy Musings – Part II

from that day to this
the girl has been dealing with an emptiness inside
the occasional mood swings, frequent crying
and those other things alike

the kid finally opened up to her family
told them of her suffering and the agony
she also informed them of the chest pains
that had started troubling her lately

the family supported the kid
and assisted her in getting the treatment
that was requisite for her, even though a little inconvenient

now the kid has been diagnosed
with anxiety and depression
so suddenly the kid has a word
that is within her comprehension

© Lishaka Gulati

P.S. this piece was written a few months back

Melancholy Musings – Part I

there once was a kid so lost
that she didn’t know what to do from one step to the next, no matter what the cost

don’t get me wrong, the kid had a wonderful family, who tried to motivate her at every step of the way
still, the kid felt lost and sad, inside her little heart but she didn’t want to bother anyone and seem apart

the kid wondered how to make sense of it all,
and in so, the kid started doing all those activities notoriously possible at school
eventually, getting the title of the coolest kid in class
but the kid still felt empty and in contrast

she then focused on her academics
and scored the best grades, inspite of her insides
being at times, in hysterics

she made her parents proud
but it still didn’t fill the kid’s hollow heart that stood unbowed

To be contd…

© Lishaka Gulati

P.S. this piece was written a few months back

Running sea

unheeded, neglected, unnoticed
a dragged affair, your profession

lately, you have been thinking about changing your job
ending, the state of thrall

but there appears to be too many options
for you to choose from
its really making you wonder
are those choices and options really there
or is it just a mirage for you
to be able to leave things with a flair

© Lishaka Gulati